Chastity

Chastity.

There's a word you don't hear every day.  In fact, it's heard so infrequently that society has lost its meaning.  This blog post aims to rectify that.


What is Chastity?

Most people mistakenly assume chastity means "virgin" or "prude".  This is incorrect because both of these terms imply avoiding all forms of sexual expression.  The opposite is shown in the Catechism's definition of chastity:

Chastity means the successful integration of sexuality within the person and thus the inner unity of man in his bodily and spiritual being. ~ CCC 2337

Chastity actually calls for an embracing of sexuality as one of the many parts that make up a person.

The virtue of chastity therefore involves the integrity of the person and the integrality of the gift. ~ CCC 2337

Chastity goes beyond sexuality, to the whole person and their relationship with others.  In reality, chastity is about owning your sexuality, and not letting it own you. It is a backwards relationship when sexuality drives a person.

 ...either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy. ~ CCC 2339

Sexuality unchecked by other parts of the person (like mind, body, and soul) will inevitably lead to what is harmful to the person. It is a real life example of the "tail wagging the dog".

Whereas, the virtue of chastity maintains the proper relationship between a person and their sexuality, leading them to avoid harmful acts and negative consequences, and leaving them to enjoy only what is good and beneficial.  In short, chastity is the virtue of sexual purity.

Who is Called to be Chaste?

The church does not discriminate.  All are called to sexual purity whether they be man or woman, young or old, clergy or laity.  The Catholic Church calls it "the vocation of chastity" and it applies to everyone equally.

All the baptized are called to chastity, the Christian has "put on Christ," the model for all chastity. All Christ's faithful are called to lead a chaste life in keeping with their particular states of life. ~ CCC 2348

The CCC goes on to say that chastity applies to married people as well as single people.  That was surprising to me the first time I heard it.  But if chastity is sexual purity, then it is something everybody needs Here is what the CCC says about chastity for married people:

"People should cultivate [chastity] in the way that is suited to their state of life. Some profess virginity or consecrated celibacy which enables them to give themselves to God alone with an undivided heart in a remarkable manner. Others live in the way prescribed for all by the moral law, whether they are married or single." Married people are called to live conjugal chastity; others practice chastity in continence:... ~ CCC 2349

The ramifications of this are pretty astounding.  It means that a man and woman having sex in a married relationship are still chaste.  This completely flies in the face of the popular definition of chastity meaning something akin to "prude virgin"!  It also speaks to how the church's teaching on sexuality all hang together and, when taken as a whole, make wonderful sense.

Since chastity is a virtue, you can develop it (just like a muscle).  Here is what the CCC says about that:

2338 The chaste person maintains the integrity of the powers of life and love placed in him. This integrity ensures the unity of the person; it is opposed to any behavior that would impair it. It tolerates neither a double life nor duplicity in speech.¹²⁴2339 Chastity includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery which is a training in human freedom. the alternative is clear: either man governs his passions and finds peace, or he lets himself be dominated by them and becomes unhappy.¹²⁵ "Man's dignity therefore requires him to act out of conscious and free choice, as moved and drawn in a personal way from within, and not by blind impulses in himself or by mere external constraint. Man gains such dignity when, ridding himself of all slavery to the passions, he presses forward to his goal by freely choosing what is good and, by his diligence and skill, effectively secures for himself the means suited to this end."¹²⁶2340 Whoever wants to remain faithful to his baptismal promises and resist temptations will want to adopt the means for doing so: self-knowledge, practice of an ascesis adapted to the situations that confront him, obedience to God's commandments, exercise of the moral virtues, and fidelity to prayer. "Indeed it is through chastity that we are gathered together and led back to the unity from which we were fragmented into multiplicity."¹²⁷2341 The virtue of chastity comes under the cardinal virtue of temperance, which seeks to permeate the passions and appetites of the senses with reason.
2342 Self-mastery is a long and exacting work. One can never consider it acquired once and for all. It presupposes renewed effort at all stages of life.¹²⁸ The effort required can be more intense in certain periods, such as when the personality is being formed during childhood and adolescence.

But what about people who have failed?  People who have lost their chastity?
So this also means that all is not lost for those that have fallen into sexual sin.  It is not a "slip once and you failed for life".  Everyone screws up.  You can pick yourself back up and succeed in becoming a chaste person.  And what a gift that will be to one day be able to give to your spouse or the Lord.

2343 Chastity has laws of growth which progress through stages marked by imperfection and too often by sin. "Man . . . day by day builds himself up through his many free decisions; and so he knows, loves, and accomplishes moral good by stages of growth."¹²⁹2344 Chastity represents an eminently personal task; it also involves a cultural effort, for there is "an interdependence between personal betterment and the improvement of society."¹³⁰ Chastity presupposes respect for the rights of the person, in particular the right to receive information and an education that respect the moral and spiritual dimensions of human life.
2345 Chastity is a moral virtue. It is also a gift from God, a grace, a fruit of spiritual effort.¹³¹ The Holy Spirit enables one whom the water of Baptism has regenerated to imitate the purity of Christ.¹³²The integrality of the gift of self
2346 Charity is the form of all the virtues. Under its influence, chastity appears as a school of the gift of the person. Self-mastery is ordered to the gift of self. Chastity leads him who practices it to become a witness to his neighbor of God's fidelity and loving kindness.
2347 The virtue of chastity blossoms in friendship. It shows the disciple how to follow and imitate him who has chosen us as his friends,¹³³ who has given himself totally to us and allows us to participate in his divine estate. Chastity is a promise of immortality.
Chastity is expressed notably in friendship with one's neighbor. Whether it develops between persons of the same or opposite sex, friendship represents a great good for all. It leads to spiritual communion.

But what does a "successful integration of sexuality within the person look like"?

Sexuality, in which man's belonging to the bodily and biological world is expressed, becomes personal and truly human when it is integrated into the relationship of one person to another, in the complete and lifelong mutual gift of a man and a woman. ~ CCC 2337

Chastity includes an apprenticeship in self-mastery which is a training in human freedom. ~ CCC 2339

Sexuality is part of the human condition.  And it is to be used as part of a lifelong relationship between man and woman, marriage.